In August, I had an orthopedic appointment. I got the best news I've ever had. I don't have to wear it to school anymore. No more loose, baggy shirts and sweaters. No more worrying about what I wear, because it might show my brace. However, I still have to wear it 12-15 hours a day. I know most of you still have to wear it to school, and I know that sucks. I remember having to wear it, and I know it's hard. Getting pinched or hurt with the brace. Not knowing if your favorite shirt works with it. It sucks, but it does get better. Even when you think it won't, it always will. Unlike some people, I never got surgery and, hopefully, never will. For those of you who did get it or need it, I can't imagine what that's like, but I know it must suck. However, I've been wearing my brace since I was 10, and now I'm 13. It was hard at school, and it still sucks to wear it, but it does, and will, get better.

My Story

Today I had an honors party at school. I was playing volleyball, and my back started to ache, more than other times. I had to sit down, and my friends kept telling me that I was scaring them. I didn't know what to say; I was in a bad mood because I'm tired of my brace getting in the way of sports and everyday life. My brace gives me sores under my arms sometimes, and they hurt. One of the x-rays from when I was 7 shows scoliosis. My doctor said that if scoliosis is evident at 7 or under you have to look for a secondary cause. I had an MRI to look for something. They found a syrinx, or a fluid bubble. This was caused because my brain was too big for my skull. I had to have a brain surgery where my surgeon removed part of my skull, part of my brain, my first vertebrae, and I have a patch on my brain. The only good thing about that was that I didn't have to wear my brace during recovery. Now I'm not saying that everyone who has scoliosis will need to go through what I did, but if you do, I'm here to talk about it. My life has gone back to normal, except for the brace. If you're having trouble dealing with having to wear a brace, it really helps to write down your feelings. Even if you aren't one with words, it doesn't matter. Writing helps deal with emotions and sort them out, I know from experience.

The Beginning of Everything

Hi. It's Courtney. I got my first scoliosis brace when I was 10, and let me just say, it wasn't the best memory. When I first got it, it was so tight. I couldn't breathe, I was in tears, and I just wanted to take it off. It's ok to feel that way, and it does get better. I remember after I got it, my family took me out to eat, and I was swaying back and forth, trying to find a comfortable position. I didn't eat much, fearing that the more I ate, the more it would hurt. Then, I had to find new clothes to wear to hide it. I liked all of my old clothes. I liked wearing what I wanted. But suddenly, I had to wear jackets over everything and make sure the fabric wasn't too clingy or tight. I had to get used to going to school with this new baggage, a tight, terrible brace. When someone tapped me on the back to get my attention, I couldn't feel it. I was oblivious to any feeling on my trunk. After the first couple of days wearing it to school, I came home crying. My mom asked me what was wrong, and I told her that someone from school had called me a robot. That's how I looked. I suddenly couldn't bend down to pick up, say a pencil. I'm in middle school now, and I've been wearing it for 3 years. Still, I sometimes come home crying because I got teased that day. Once, in the hallway, I was walking with my friend and someone taps me on the back and yells down the hallway, "Why is your back so hard?" I didn't know what to say. I'm not open about my brace. Thankfully, one of my friends said that everyone's back is hard, but I never forgot that moment. Another time one of my on-again off-again friends must've seen it, because they said "What. Is. That?" I just said it was my brace, but after that class ended, I started crying. My friends comforted me, but they don't know what it's like. It's ok to cry and be mad about your brace, and it's good to get all of those emotions out. I've been through the same things. Don't be afraid to let everything out and communicate with those who do get it.